Luna

Hans: Guess who is no longer a 21 year old virgin? - Peter: Oh, my God! Really?! Congratulations! - Hans: Yes, I turned 22 yesterday.

High in the Japanese mountains, a Zen student asks the master: “Master Aikodo, why do Europeans think we all look the same? - The master replies: “I am not Master Aikodo.”

Small survey for married people: On a scale of 1-10, how much do you have the say in your marriage. - Darling, can I take part in the survey?

Woman: “Doctor, can I go swimming with diarrhea?” - Doctor: "Yeah, sure, if you fill the tub."

Fritzchen comes to his mother and says: "Today in the subway, Dad told me to get up so that a lady could sit in my seat." - Mother: "Yes, that's called good manners." - Son: "But I sat on his lap!"

Why do officers always pick their noses on Fridays? - Answer: Because at the end of the working week they have to give their all again.

A grandpa drives his car to a police checkpoint. There are dozens of police officers standing around. The grandpa asks confused: “What’s going on here?” - The police officer says: “We’re looking for a rapist!” - After a short pause for thought, the grandpa says: “OK, I’ll do it!”

Caller: My candy bar is stuck in the machine. - Emergency service: We are an emergency service and are not responsible for this. - Caller: Hello, are you even listening to me?

Father to son: “If you want to impress girls at the swimming pool, just put a potato in your swimming trunks.” - The next morning the son sits in the room crying. The father wants to know what happened. - Then the son says: “You should have told me that the potato had to go in the front!”

Doctor: "Being fat is not good for your health. You are too fat." - Man: "I think I'd better get a second opinion here." - Doctor: "You're ugly too."

A scantily clad lady actually approached me at the train station. She said she would do anything I wanted for 30 euros. Now guess who is laying my laminate flooring today?ite, die supergute Witze hat.

The dentist takes out the anesthetic syringe and says: "This might hurt a little bit." - The patient says: "Oh, that doesn't matter to me!" - The dentist says: “Good! I have been in a relationship with your wife for 3 years."

A smaller teenager sits in the stairwell and drinks wine. A neighbor comes by and asks: “What’s wrong, little one?” “My father,” the boy sobs, “hit his finger with a hammer.” “Then why are you crying?” “Because I laughed badly at first!”

Box of beer In Vienna, a construction worker, Mr. Maier, falls from scaffolding and is fatally injured. Now the foreman complains: “Someone has to go to the old lady now and he says that her mother is never alive. He instructs the helper to deliver the message. After an hour he comes back with two crates of beer. The foreman: "You idiot, you shouldn't go to Billa for beer, you should go to the old lady Maier and tell her that she's never alive!" The unskilled worker then says: “Yes, boss, I was with Mrs. Maier! I rang the bell and Mrs. Maier opens the door." "Yes, and continue," urges the policeman... "I say, 'Are you a widow Maier?'

Quick-witted After an argument, Lady Nancy Astor angrily told Prime Minister Winston Churchill: "If I were your wife, I would put poison in your tea." He replied dryly: "If you were my wife, I would drink it."